You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
