just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
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