you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize