If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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