I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
