I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
