Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
