his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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