just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I would fuck him just for his dog
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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