i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
