i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
