i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
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It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
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just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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