try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
