I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
