i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
