oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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