Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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