Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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