Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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