Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
