HIV tests are more positive than that guy
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
