I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
So squirting runs in the family.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
