i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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