You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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