u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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