Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
