theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
