my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
he shaved USA in his pubs
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
