We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
