I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
