apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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