im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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