Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
