So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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