apparently the secret to your success is patron
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
two words...techno handjob
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
