so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Man, jail baloney is awful.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
