worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize