Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
did you just send me my own nude
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
