Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize