Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
