you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
