I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
