Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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