we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
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do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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