Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
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