Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
