GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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