we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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