did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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