I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
